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[22 Jan 2005|09:33am] |
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so i haven't updated since forever and i doubt anyone even reads this anymore because of that.. but i decided for whatever god awful reason i'm going to check out my journal and see what everyones doing... Well oddly i felt like a sophmore-junior in high school again.. i felt all the old emotions rushing back of course they were the bad ones... it's pretty funny to me now how obvious it is that livejournal did anything but help me... i mean to be completely honest i think half of the entries i used to put up were just pleas for help or some type of comments.. well i'm sure all of my entries are for some type of comments.. even the really angry ones i wrote.. it's weird how i miss some of these emotions and how sometimes when i'm just sitting by myself i think of a lot of the old stuff and i get this lump in the throat and i get annoyed or upset or whatever.. it almost makes me think that i've been running from the past the whole time never really confronting it.. but i don't think that's it.. even now writing this entry you can be sure i'm hopeing someone will read it and someone will say something about it.. and most likely the first instict will be a cheerful message and what have you.. but the more i think about it the more i realize that's not so bad.. i mean the reality is everyones looking for some type of comfort someones screaming to be heard... i just find it funny how we release it online.. why not in public? i guess it's mainly for our friends to see but aw hell it's fun in public... if you're reading this right now and are feeling down put some song you love and scream it at the top of your lungs in the house outside in the car... i dunno why i fear being humiliated but i mean fuck if you're not gonna do something crazy then no one is right? and who doesn't love a crazy person? I mean all through high school everyone says flynn you're crazy.. i still get it in college especially from my roommates and stuff.. but that's what got me "popular" ... in honesty there were only a few people that were truly what i would consider friends all through high school.. otherwise everyone was just an aquaintance... ah i actually almost feel like this helped... i suggest everyone read fight club btw... I think the tyler durdan philosophy is pretty kick ass and i think i'm gonna follow it to an extent... well then on that note it's time to get some clothes ready for the meet today
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| College |
[21 Sep 2004|09:31am] |
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well i haven't updated in a long time. BUT here it is brought to you simply because someone wanted me too. College has made so much change already. I can tell from all the different things my friends are going through and how they're treating different things differently. i already feel liberated and much different then i used to. Running is much the same minus the fact that i'm feeling much more sore and stuff then normal but i'll deal with it i guess. I've been running great and i can't wait to feel better so i can really run well. Um not much else to say except that i love each and everyone of you very dearly and i hope that your endevours for the most part are going as well as mine. and if your roommates are assholes and you want to get revenge wake them up in the morning really early and they'll learn really quick.
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[11 Jun 2004|01:16am] |
Pitter Patter the footsteps are heard
There’s an echo of a foot falling in the distance
A shadow of a man, though it seems simple
One can easily see that this man is anything but ordinary
He holds himself kind of slacked but still in a way that demands respect
While he jokes you can see the genuine smile that shines on his face
And although his tie may never be quite the tie you’d find on any normal teacher
If you took a second you’d realize that this man could give you better advice then any other person you’ve ever met
He willingly gives his advice at the tip of a hat
There always seems to be this magical twinkle in his eye
Even on his worst days he touches 5 peoples lives
Their once was a man of this stature
He was everyone’s friend
He was loved by everyone
Not a single enemy did he have
Not even the jealous types
He made sure to uphold what he thought was right
And he did his best to keep up the fight
If you walk down the halls now you’ll see many people
Many people that you once knew
Many people that have no bearing on you
Many people that look different and that you’ve never met
But in all of these people you can catch a glimmer of him in them
This great man shall always live on in our hearts and minds
He is sitting happily in heaven enjoying every minute of it
I’m sure he is wishing us lives that will enjoy what there is to enjoy
I’m sure that many people will try to live up to his standards
And while many will make attempts none will ever come close
I know in my heart that when I walk down these halls
I’ll hear my foot steps echo and I’ll feel his behind mine
I know when I see a chair sitting outside the nurses office
I’ll know who’s shadow it is standing beside it
Mr. Perino was once that man and he will always be that man
Forever in the places we love
And forever in the echoes of the sound of footsteps and chit chat
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[14 Apr 2004|07:08pm] |
hey everybody how's it goin? well tomorrow is officially 9 months with elaina! i'm so happy with her i'm glad everything is going the way it is... she is so perfect and so good to me i couldn't ask for a better girl ever! been hanging out with chris more lately mainly since i've had more time with no school and all that's been really cool too! runnings been going great and everything also so things are definately on a plus side for me as of right now.. i am becoming a big time producer of movies lol so far i've made i think 6 of them and i thought they were all pretty comical or romantic/comical... so yeah everything is good and yeah i'm happy :)
I want everyone who reads this to ask me 3 questions, no more no less. Ask me anything you want and I will answer it. Then, I want you to go to your journal, copy and paste this allowing your friends (including myself) to ask you anything.
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[22 Feb 2004|10:37am] |
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alright so let's see recap since the 8th.. urm long (i wish) mid winter recess in which i saw elaina every single day!!!! yay!!!!!! however i also did work in the basement every single day ... it turned out really good though... so valentines day was nothing short of amazing.. i was all trying to think of nice ways to surprise elaina and all so what i finally did was put a blindfold on her and took her to where we first kissed and gave her my presents there and everything... that was a great day.. she gave me this awesome board with pictures of me and her and us and little hearts that say be mine kiss me love you and then she gave me the key to her heart :) :) :) the rest of the night we just you know hung around... then my meet was awesome i ran 943 so i'm really coming back strong and i was in the newspaper for it and everything it was great... then also the same day i had elaina come over and celebrate our 7 month aniversary :) i can't believe how lucky i am to have such an amazing girlfriend the whole week we pretty much went back and forth to eachothers houses and we also went on another date :) we were gonna have this whole nice date thing on tuesday but things got complicated and it didn't work out but on thursday we went to fridays and that was just perfect too.. so friday lots of work on the basement cause saturday was the party and i only got to see elaina at night but then saturday (aka my birthday) was amazing also.. finished the room we were working on had elaina and chris and gina come over early and we started talking and playing some games and stuff it was an awesome time elaina never ceases with good gifts.. she gave me a really nice key chain that has our names embroaded on the front and our date on the back it's really nice and pretty lol... chris and gina gave me another gangsta hoodie which was awesome very comfy.. and a video gift card def will put that to use lol.. and i also got a visa buxx card and a master gift card so i'm really feeling adultish lol... yay! well i love elaina very much and yeah
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| My poor babbi |
[08 Feb 2004|09:03am] |
What's goin down guys? can't remember when i last updated.. i don't think it was after leagues though soooo... WE WON!! yeah kick ass... that was a masacar and a half but yeah it was good stuff... runnings going awesome and i've got a new "misson" that i have to partake of soon.. however i keep waking up with a sore throat so i think i'm starting to develop a little cold :( ... speaking of sick my poor laina was sooo sick last night i felt soo bad :( ... she's so cute though i had a great time with her yesterday especially when we were cross dressing oh yeah let me tell you... that was urm.. yeah... let's just say i was wearing a skirt definately too short lol... but apparently i have girlish legs but my stomach is definately not? and since i have these "grooves" or whatever toni called them in my hips i'm very in shape or something? i dunno apparently it's a good thing though so i'm not gonna complain or anything lol... speaking of in shape i lost more weight and i'm down to 121 again woot woot! hmm let's see... well i've been grounded (don't remember if i mentioned that...) to a once a week outting with elaina sentence.. more like pretty gay... valentines coming up really soon.. urm... 7 months is the day after but so is cities so i guess i'll see her at night.. and i'm getting my car register on MONDAY YAY!!!!!!! i can't wait to drive my car i can't fuckin wait.. i better clean the inside though it's still got dog hair and crap in it.. maybe if it's niceish out i'll do it.. anyway i love elaina revans very much and running is kick ass and now that i can drive i can hopefully see more people (baldi) more often
ok so everyone do me a favor and do this thing i stole from g's journal
1. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
2. Am I loveable?
3. How long have you known me?
4. When and how did we first meet?
5. What was your first impression?
6. Do you still think that way about me now?
7. What do you think my weakness is?
8. Do you think I'll get married?
9. What makes me happy?
10. What makes me sad?
11. What reminds you of me?
12. If you could give me anything what would it be?
13. How well do you know me?
14. When's the last time you saw me?
15. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
16. Do you think I could kill someone?
17. Describe me in one word.
18. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?
19. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?
20. Are you going to put this on your LiveJournal and see what I say about you?
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[17 Jan 2004|07:10pm] |
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what's up guys and gals? it's like 7 and it's the 17th it's been over 6 months for me and laina.. and let me tell you they have been an amazing 6 months for me and i'm pretty sure the same goes for her.. but! i'm fucking lonely as hell cause i haven't seen her in sooooo damn long and she's at a family party and let me just tell you it was very upsetting since i was not only right by the party house but of course the aunts house was you know right off an exit i distinctly remember passing :*( and of course it's supposed to snow tonight into tomorrow can we say uper fucking gay all i have to say is if i don't see her tomorrow i'm gonna kill someone and if anyone even tries to make it so i can't see her monday they will be sacrificed cause i don't give a fuck if i have to run to her house i'm getting there one way or another *sigh*.. runnings going really good umm things are interesting in other aspects and i'm starting to get tired of a few (one) bitch(es) that keeps doing not such good things to my buddy which obviously makes me very (very) angry and yeah.. yeah.. so i love you elaina and I LOVE YOU MOST!
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| UPDATE!! |
[01 Jan 2004|08:09am] |
alwight.. unlike homestarrunner.com i am actually updating!!!! (trying to see if that'll coax them along hopefully it'll work) first off HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!!!!!!! 2004 as my lovely lady said it on the phone we graduate this year.. that's right folks no more high school in only 4 more months for everyone and about 26 days off somewhere within those months and then take off the weekends and we've got a lot less!!! lol
if someone would be so kind as to do the math for me i'd appreciate it.. so last night where was in when the ball dropped? i was in the quiet setting of gina and chris baldi's home chris was on the phone and me and gina were anxiously watching the ball drop as i was on the phone with the love of my life (if you don't know by now since it's 6 months in 14 days :) her name is ELAINA!) i began to think about how great life can be and you know just because it's 2004 doesn't mean shit it's just another year.. that's because it's just a ball dropping and you know there's nothing more to it then that ... empires don't spring up over night they take time.. as the ball hits bottom i think of how my life hit rock bottom somewhere in the beginning of last year and then the lights signifying it's 2004 flare up and i realize that as shitty as last year started out it ended in a much better way... it made me realize that no matter how bad things get i'll work it out and something good will happen (eventually) .. so after screaming i say happy new year to my babbi and tell her i love her and i realize how everything is so great for us and that as much as we have our problems it's so worth it every second that we have to be together... i had a good talk with gina last night we discussed the fact that things are so much different from what we expected them to be since new years eve last year... a lot of things changed in a really quick amount of time.. i remember it like yesterday that i had my problems with marykate and yet it was about a year ago.. times like those never seemed to go fast for anyone.. it seems that you're worst times always take the longest to get through and then you zip right through your good times.. meeting elaina was the best thing that ever happened to me.. it made me a better person a more caring person a better family member it gave me a much better life.. it taught me to love with all my heart again with out any fear.. and it taught me what love truly feels like when it's coming back your way.. as much as we plan to hold on to eachother for as long as possible (which could be till the end since we're stubborn like that ;) ) if i was to lose her i'd be happy that i got all the things i did from her.. because of her i know what i should really live my life like... thank you so much elaina i love you much much more with every day that passes by...
chris i dunno if you even bother to read this anymore but i wanted to say sorry things got the way they did.. (insert anti dramatic scene in here since it sounded so dramatic) we haven't hung out a lot lately.. we really haven't hung out at all.. i'm sorry i let that happen cause you and your sister are the origional and still are the best friends i have and you're always there for me ALWAYS no matter what.. you helped me realize so much and helped me grow from that little punk 6th grader i was that no one liked to a somewhat decent senior lol.. i promise we'll hang out more and i'll talk to you soon later!
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| 5 MONTHS!!!!! |
[16 Dec 2003|07:08am] |
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so yeah it's been five months since i asked out laina (yesterday was actually but yeah) it's awesome that we're still together this is what i've been waiting for ever since i started dating :) ... anyway things with her are awesome... things with chris and gina are awesome too it's nice to see them happy and not all sadish like they sometimes get.. i ran yesterday (2 miles!!! yay!) and it felt fine and it feels good right now *knocks on wood* and i'm getting my real orthodics soon hopefully... i better i really need those things... i still have to go christmas shopping but i've got almost everything for elaina done and i've got ideas for gina and chris and now i need to think about my family... it's starting to feel like christmas and i'm in a good mood :) i love elaina soooooo much she's my everything !!!! :)
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[04 Dec 2003|06:00pm] |
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i did this really cool survey but i lost the results and it takes too long to take over ... but basically i'm a well sex drived kid that's a hundred percent straight
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[28 Nov 2003|03:26pm] |
 | The Big Five Personality Test | | Extroverted | |||||||||||||||||| | 76% | | Introverted | |||||| | 24% | | Friendly | |||||||||||| | 46% | | Aggressive | |||||||||||||| | 54% | | Orderly | |||||||||||||||| | 62% | | Disorderly | |||||||||| | 38% | | Relaxed | |||||||||||| | 50% | | Emotional | |||||||||||| | 50% | | Openminded | |||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Closeminded | |||||| | 30% | Take Free Big 5 Personality Test |
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[13 Nov 2003|05:38pm] |
I LOVE ELAINA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
things are goin great... i wrote an entry last night but got kicked off by dad so i had to quickly x it out.. went to pediatrist and i have a stress fracture apparently... or that's his belief... anyway other then that life's great.. i finally got to talk to the drivers ed guy so that's in the working process.. now i just have to schedule everything right so i can actually get the driving done... i hope i get it all done by maybe next week get my test scheduled and pass that and i'll be really happy.. i really wanna drive despite what people think... anyway i need to do stuff goin to feds tomorrow night yay!!!!!! then saturday it's 4 months!!!!!!!!!! i can't believe it *****4 months***** man it's so awesome i love her sooo much
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[08 Nov 2003|08:54am] |
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i'll write more later but i'll also be on crutches or something... basically i love elaina a lot and she's perfect and everything to me so yeah that's awesome and i'm running to win today... we'll see how it goes
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| the shady lady emails to me :) |
[03 Nov 2003|05:26pm] |
1. Falling in love.
2. Laughing so hard your face hurts.
3. A hot shower/bath.
4. No lines at the supermarket.
5. A special glance.
6. Getting mail.
7. Taking a drive on a pretty road.
8. Hearing your favorite song on the radio.
9. Lying in bed listening to the rain outside.
10. Hot towels fresh out of the dryer.
11. Finding the sweater you want is on sale for half price.
12. Chocolate milkshake (or vanilla)! (or strawberry).
13. A long distance phone call.
14. A bubble bath.
15. Giggling.
16. A good conversation.
17. The beach.
18. Finding a $20 bill in your coat from last winter.
19. Laughing at yourself.
20. Midnight phone calls that last for hours.
21. Running through sprinklers.
22. Laughing for absolutely no reason at all.
23. Having someone tell you that you're beautiful.
24. Laughing at an inside joke.
25. Friends.
26. Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you.
27. Waking up and realizing you still have a few hours left to sleep.
28. Your first kiss (either the very first or with a new partner).
29. Making new friends or spending time with old ones.
30. Playing with a new puppy.
31. Having someone play with your hair.
32. Sweet dreams.
33. Hot chocolate.
34. Road trips with friends.
35. Swinging on swings.
36. Eating cookies and drinking your favorite hot toddy.
37. Song lyrics printed inside your new CD so you can sing along without feeling stupid.
38. Going to a really good concert.
39. Making eye contact with a cute stranger.
40. Winning a really competitive game.
41. Making chocolate chip cookies.
42. Having your friends send you homemade cookies.
43. Spending time with close friends.
44. Seeing smiles and hearing laughter from your friends.
45. Holding hands with someone you care about.
46. Running into an old friend and realizing that something's (good or bad) never change.
47. Riding the best roller coasters over and over.
48. Watching the expression on someone's face as they open a much desired present from you.
49. Watching the sunrise.
50. Getting out of bed every morning and being grateful for another beautiful day.
There's a piece of you that's here with me
It's everywhere I go, it's everything I see
When I sleep, I dream and it gets me by
I can make believe that you're here tonight
If I could find you now things would get better
We could leave this town and run forever
I know somewhere, somehow we'll be together
Let your waves crash down on me and take me away
... anyway life is great and rrrrrrrrr annoying... great cause everything is going great minus my mother fucking leg!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that's the rrrrrrrrrrr annoying part... whatever schools goin good almost finished this fordham application
i think i'll go to d ed tomorrow just to talk to them and get a 5 hour pass or somethin cause i'm gettin fed up with waiting as is everyone i know lol... the love of my life (who's still elaina SURPRISE SURPRISE MATT CAN STAY WITH ONE GIRL FOR MORE THEN 2 MONTHS!!!!) (more like a girl can stand matt for more then 2 months but anyway) is amazing... she's so grrrreeaaatt and really knows how to make me happy... yeah i love her... a lllllloooooottttttt... and i miss her too... i find i miss her more then i see her.. can we say unfair? i can.... chris has a girlfriend now amazering... and it's not amanda.. even more amazering .. but yeah... yeah... anywho... still not able to run.. more like my leg got a lot more gayer by the min... i can't believe it's almost 4 months... wow ... double the longest relationship (can we say pathetic?) lol I LOVE YOU !!!!!!
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[23 Oct 2003|06:01pm] |
I LOVE ELAINA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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[03 Oct 2003|08:15am] |
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so lets see the run down.. school is goin alright .. my injuried leg is doin much better *knock on wood* my running up until then was doing really good.... laina is amazing always has been always will be :) .. and yeah that's about it ...
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[25 Sep 2003|04:49pm] |
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well first off i just wanna say i have the BEST GIRLFRIEND EVER!!!!! she's so amazing and perfect for me i've never had these kinds of feelings and thoughts.. i dunno she's so perfect and different from all the other girls i've been with it's really awesome... been sick recently though that sucks.. i had a fever on tuesday that was really horrible after my run and then yesterday i didn't get to run and today i'm not running.... i actually stayed home today and laina showed up to surprise me :) :) :) it was awesome... she made me feel so much better it was weird and yet awesome.. i'm really blessed i have a wonderful girlfriend a wonderful talent in running and definately the best best friends anyone could ever ask for.. chris and me are definately brothers in heart and soul it's so cool.. we both bring things out of eachother that no one else has and it's really cool knowing that i can talk to him about anything and he wouldn't flinch no matter how fucked up it'd be.. so basically life is awesome *knock on wood* and i love everyone and i love some people *cough laina cough* more then they love me :)
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